I Am the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Arnold Schwarzenegger Comedy: An Interview.

The action icon is best known as an action movie legend. But, during the peak of his cinematic dominance in the 1980s and 1990s, he also starred in several genuinely hilarious comedies. The standout film is Kindergarten Cop, which hits its 35th anniversary this winter.

The Story and That Line

In the classic film, Schwarzenegger plays a hardened detective who goes undercover as a kindergarten teacher to locate a fugitive. Throughout the story, the procedural element serves as a loose framework for the star to share adorable scenes with children. Without a doubt the standout features a child named Joseph, who unprompted rises and declares the former bodybuilder, “Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina.” The Terminator responds dryly, “Thank you for that information.”

That iconic child was played by former young actor Miko Hughes. His career featured a character arc on Full House playing the antagonist to the famous sisters and the character of the resurrected boy in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He still works in film today, with several projects in development. Furthermore, he engages with fans at fan conventions. He recently discussed his experiences from the set of Kindergarten Cop over three decades on.

A Young Actor's Perspective

Question: Starting off, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I think I was four. I was the youngest of all the kids on set.

That's impressive, I have no memory from being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?

Yeah, a little bit. They're flashes. They're like mental photographs.

Do you recall how you landed the job in Kindergarten Cop?

My mother, mainly would accompany me to auditions. Often it was like a cattle call. There'd be dozens of children and we'd all simply wait around, enter the casting office, be in there briefly, do whatever little line they wanted and then leave. My parents would feed me the lines and then, once I learned to read, that was probably the first stuff I was reading.

Do you have any recollection of meeting Arnold? What was your impression of him?

He was very kind. He was fun. He was pleasant, which arguably stands to reason. It would be strange if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a productive set. He was great to work with.

“It'd be weird if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom.”

I knew he was a big action star because my family informed me, but I had never really seen his movies. I felt the importance — it was exciting — but he didn't really intimidate me. He was simply playful and I just wanted to play with him when he had time. He was working hard, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would cling to his muscles. He'd flex and we'd be dangling there. He was really, really generous. He bought every kid in the classroom a personal stereo, which at the time was the hottest tech. This was the hottest tech out there, that iconic bright yellow cassette player. I listened to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for a long time on that thing. It finally gave out. I also was given a real silver whistle. He had the teacher's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your days on set as being enjoyable?

You know, it's interesting, that movie was this cultural thing. It was such a big movie, and it was such an amazing experience, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, working with [director] Ivan Reitman, visiting Astoria, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For instance, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the meat from the top. Then, the original Game Boy was brand new. That was the coolest toy, and I was pretty good at it. I was the youngest and some of the other children would bring me their Game Boys to pass certain levels on games because I could do it, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all youthful anecdotes.

The Infamous Moment

OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember anything about it? Did you grasp the meaning?

At the time, I wasn't fully aware of what the word taboo meant, but I knew it was provocative and it caused the crew to chuckle. I knew it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given approval in this case because it was humorous.

“My mom thought hard about it.”

How it was conceived, according to family lore, was they didn't have specific roles. Some character lines were established early on, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it was more of a collaboration, but they worked on it while filming and, presumably it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "We're thinking. We want Miko to deliver this dialogue. Are you okay with this?" My mom paused. She said, "I need to consider this, let me sleep on it" and took a short while. It was a tough call for her. She said she wasn't sure, but she thought it will probably be one of the unforgettable moments from the movie and she was right.